Earth day? What the hell kind of dysfunctional hippie commune have we created here?

Granted The Sass can do no wrong, but it feels to this jerk like we’re getting away from the original intent of this vibrant and relevant ressource d’Internet. That intent being, possibly unarticulated until now, to identify, incubate, support and promote jerkiness throughout the universe¹.

And so with that new found focus, a new-found (and likely tenuous and patchily implemented²) format: The Big Jerky How-To. Commentary on how to get the most jerk out of your day to day existence.

With a new focus and a new format should come a brand new layout. This is one of those things (I still can’t bring myself to type the word) were the medium, comoditized as it is, is assigned significantly more significance³ than the message. A deadly mix of laziness and talentlessness⁴ prevents this. Are you over it?

If you were confused about what tethers and pound signs have to do with jerks and the inconsistent (both in frequency and quality) hilarity that calls Jerk Spot its home, allow me to offer the following by way of explanation:

Hypothesis: Love letters targeted to specific niche geek issues will generate traffic and commentary disproportionate to that of Britney chatter and facial hair tirades.

Observations: None so far.

Conclusion: Pending results of study.

Yes I’m a flake¹ and yes I can’t pay attention to one thing for more than six days. But those are not the reasons why it has been so long since I’ve penned (keyboarded? computered?) a love letter.

Here is a lie for you: I haven’t been writing here because I have been busy writing my November novel. I actually did write about sixteen hundred words…² but considering the fact that you’re supposed to write about that much each day and it took me twelve days, I think shameful surrender might be in the cards.

My work iTunes is on Party Shuffle and I only manage to pay attention to it when random awful songs come on and I have to, with great embarrassment, perform a deselect/skip combo. Most of them are not my fault, having been (and mostly remaining) totally mislabeled downloads. Honest.

But back on point, I wasn’t forgetting about Jerk Spot. (Which a friend, seeing a link on my jerkberry last night, was convinced was a porn site.) But I was all gung-ho on this one project³ that just finished up at 1:02pm this afternoon. It kept me all tied up. But now it’s done. And I’m stoked. Ready to party. Ready to Madonna Party⁴, actually. And then take pictures to write snarky, insubstantial love letters about.